WRITE-UP ON "ME TOO"
The trending topic now in Indis is "Me Too". So this write - up!
Me Too founder Tarana Burke: ‘You have to use your privilege to serve other people’
Every day the women and the girl children travelling in the bus facing the molestation problem and how much mental trauma and difficulties they are facing only the other co-passengers will know. Those men who are misusing the given situation are animals. And child abuse is also more nowadays. The responsibility of the parents and teachers are more nowadays in terms of safeguarding the children.
I would like to share two incidents which show the intensity of the responsibility to be taken by the parents on their children:
1. My auto driver has got two daughters and both are pursuing
B Com in a college. The auto driver daily drops his daughters and picks them up. One day one of his daughters fell ill so he didn't drop his second daughter. I told him anyways you are going to drop and pick up your daughter. So if one daughter is on leave what is the harm in dropping your second daughter. He replied since one daughter took leave another daughter should be left alone inside the college. I don't want to take any risk. If one took leave, I will not allow another daughter to attend college. Am so scared since it is a Co-Ed college. I was really shocked on hearing this.
2. The second incident was interesting. Only during the morning while going to office I will go by auto. The evening I will catch only PTC bus. One evening when I was waiting at the bus stop, one college girl was also standing next to me, waiting for the bus. First, she got a call from his father. she told " I am still standing in the bus stop, waiting for the bus. Within 2 minutes her mother called her. That girl got annoyed. She told her mom, " I think you and daddy both are living in one house only. Just now daddy called me and asked if I got onto the bus. I replied him am still waiting for the bus. within two minutes you are calling. Don't irritate me. I myself will inform you once I got onto the bus." I understand that girl's angry and at the same time, her parents worry.
This is the situation prevailing everywhere.
Recently few celebrities revealed about the sexual harassment faced by them. So many views and debates are going on the matter. Few are supporting and few are asking for the proof. Where is the proof for these things? Only the accused shall come out with the truth. And law & Order also should investigate this.
Child abuse is more nowadays and I summarized the most important things to be followed by the parents on this taken from the google on searching. It is very very useful.
Why particularly am keen on child abuse is, recently during the month of July 2018, a deaf and dumb child raped by 20 men, which was heartbreaking, shaken the entire Tamil Nadu and shocking. Then I decided to reproduce certain important points which I gathered from Google on search. I humbly request parents to take care of their children, girls as well as boys & protect them as they are our precious and God's gift to us.
(CHILD SEXUAL ABUSE) CSA occurs when an adult or older adolescent uses a child for sexual stimulation.
The touching rules:
When teaching children to be safe, avoid using the terms ‘good touch’ and ‘bad touch’, because abusers can very easily manipulate children into believing that what is being done to them is ‘good’.
The correct terms to use are ‘safe touch’, ‘unsafe touch’ and ‘confusing touch’.
The safe touch makes a child feel loved, supported and cared for and comfortable with self and the person.
The unsafe touch makes a child feel doubtful, uncomfortable, physically and emotionally hurt, afraid and repulsed.
The confusing touch makes a child experience mixed feelings. The touch can ‘feel good’ because of the stimulation, and yet instinctively guilt may arise. The child is led to believe the touch is a special privilege but also feels uncomfortable and unsure.
What you must teach your children
To be the boss of their own bodies, why and how they should keep clean and healthy
The private body parts are those covered by the undergarments. The mouth is also a private part
No one needs to look at, touch or photograph their private body parts, except for cleanliness and health reasons
There is never a need for them to look at or touch someone else’s private body parts
It is never their fault if someone breaks the touching rules. Teach them to say NO and move away. If they can’t get away immediately, it is still not their fault
To never keep it a secret, to tell an older person whom they trust and to keep telling till someone listens and keeps them safe
How to respond to a child’s disclosure
When a child discloses sexual abuse or molestation it is one of the most devastating experiences for parents and caregivers, and an alarming experience for the child.
The first step to take in dealing with the situation is to take care of yourself. The matter could leave you feeling shocked, angry, confused, emotionally drained and helpless.
Reassuring things to say when a child discloses:
- ‘I believe you’
- ‘You are not to blame’
- ‘I am glad that you told me’
- ‘I will help you’
Things not to say when a child discloses:
- ‘You should have told someone before’
- ‘I can’t believe it! I am shocked!’
- ‘Oh, that explains a lot’
- ‘A family member will never do this’
- ‘My friend would never do this’
Things to do:
- Reassure the child that it was right to tell you
- Give the child time to talk about the situation. Avoid pushing for details or asking too many questions
- Tell the child that, with her permission, you will only tell people who are going to help her, not anyone else
- Keep the child safe from the abuser
- Immediately seek the help of competent people
- Seek help for yourself if you feel you need support
Things not to do:
Do not justify, offer alternative explanations, make excuse for disregard the seriousness of the abuser’s behaviour
Do not justify, offer alternative explanations, make excuse for disregard the seriousness of the abuser’s behaviour
Where to get help:
Approach local agencies that work with the victims and their families.
Seek the support of a qualified counsellor who has also trained in this area of work.
Approach local agencies that work with the victims and their families.
Seek the support of a qualified counsellor who has also trained in this area of work.
Chennai: For over seven months, a 12-year-old girl was allegedly raped by as many as 20 men, most of the security guards and maintenance workers at an apartment complex at Ayanavaram in Chennai.
The police have arrested 17 people, including the society’s security guard, and produced them before a magistrate on Tuesday afternoon. When they were brought to court, they were thrashed allegedly by some lawyers. The Madras high court lawyers association has also decided not to represent an accused in the case.
The accused, police said, drugged and sedated the victim, who has a hearing disability, before sexually assaulting her. The police say she was also blackmailed. The accused, who included the lift operators and water suppliers who frequented the gated apartment complex, threatened her with dire consequences if she told her family.
A police officer said the girl was first sexually assaulted by a lift operator and later several others joined in the assault.
At least four of them have confessed to the assault, while two others said they had molested the girl, the officer said.
Police said further investigations were on and CCTV footage would be analysed. "We are taking it as a special case and working on it," the officer said, adding that the hunt is on for the rest of the perpetrators.
I pray God such incidents shall not be repeated anywhere in the world. I would like to request all the parents to take care of their children with the utmost care, love and affection. I also would request teachers who spend most of the time with their students to keep a vigil on them. Thank you.
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